Sunday, June 29, 2008


I just read "Popcorn" by Ben Elton. It was ok. Didnt like it much though.


Note to self : Though you may hate sem endings, you have a lot to look forward to.
Get a life, girl.

And puh-lease STOP cribbing.

Go on now.

Sunday, June 22, 2008


Cartoons have always captured the interest of the young, and the not-so young, courtesy my Grand Pa. My little sister sits in front of the telly right after she comes home from school and watches Chotta Bheem on CN. And later at around 5 Ben10 or something else. She reminds me of MY days as a primary school-goer. I used to come home myself at around 3:30 PM. I used to fling my bag on the chair, remove my shoes, without unbuckling them, mind, and sit down to watch Ninja Robots and Captain Planet. Power Zone, I think the time period was named.


I used to love those shows. Ninja Robots, especially. I had a huge crush on Joe. I thought the names “Mantis”, “Icelander”, “Cybertron” were cool. I used to watch them with my eyes popped out.

I still remember those days. When I see my kid sister, I sometimes see myself in her. Or rather, what I’d been doing in her age. There are, undoubtedly, huge differences. But still.

I found this on YouTube. I was nearly in tears watching it again after all these years. It made me feel real good, though.


Friday, June 20, 2008

The best season

Agnostic me

Dear God

I am doing quite well here these days. My thinking has become more coherent. I do believe that I am competent enough to encounter whatever is in store for me. I hope it all works well. There are times when I still feel a tad different. No, I no more feel like am losing my mind and going crazy. I think that I’m well past that stage where I weep, for me. I now know that I’ll just have to live with it. But the past hovers around me like a night shadow. I can’t get it off my back. Although, looking elsewhere helps all the time. I cried today. I cried today for no particular reason at all. The tears just rolled out. It felt good later. The best part was, though I wept fast and hard, I stopped just as soon. I dried my eyes and sat still for a long time. I sat and I thought. The road ahead is dark, illuminated only a few steps at a time. I drift about. I don’t look over my shoulder. I turn back completely and look. I might stray the wrong way. I might do so knowingly enough. I like to explore. I want to discover. The hidden, darker paths might mislead me, bring distress upon me, I care less. I know me. I know that I always end up on the right path. I ask for a chance to ascertain to myself on the ways of this life. I do not seek your guidance nor do I seek your assistance. I merely ask for your patience and support. Do not misread my words. I am already on my way. On my way ahead.


Thursday, June 19, 2008

One life to live

My dear mother apparently thought I was on the phone in the wee hours of the morning. She kinda freaked out. I told her that I understood how she felt.

I put myself in her place and my 7 year old sis in mine.

I’d react the same way too, I guess. Or maybe not. Seeing that I am me, and not my mother.

Anyway, lets assume that I thought right.(Assuming that I DO react like my mother)

I’d ask her,

- Why was she on a convo at that time. Shouldn’t she be sleeping? Huh?

- Who was she talking to? Her friend? A stranger?(Very unlikely) Or someone else?

- What was the need to talk right then?

- DOES she know the consequences of it?

Now, knowing my shrewd sis, she’d have all the answers to it.
(Unlike me, I stumble at words in real life, most of the time.)

Now lets assume that I thought wrong.

I’d ask her the same questions.
But the results would be quite adverse...

I told my mother about this. I also told her that it would be one life that my sis would live to enjoy. So, I’d let it be.

Anyway, that’s what I felt, speaking like a late teen, almost in her twenties.


Thursday, June 12, 2008


Today’s paper reported a suicide. “A 23 year old air hostess hanged herself on Saturday”. The paper reported that she had “everything going for her”. But she had filed an FIR with the police against her in-laws. The husband had harassed her more than once for dowry. The same story. Drunken husband, the beatings, all that.

But what struck me the most was this.

She had married her husband while she was still 18. Yes, 18. Apparently, she met him at a local mall and fell in love with him. The parents conceded after a while and the couple got happily married a few years back.

My point is this.

A mall? 18?

Tell me, do you even know what love is at that age? Sure, you’ll have your crushes and infatuations. You might like every other girl/guy. Think he/she is cute/cool/beautiful/hot/what-not. But are you ready for commitment? Oh yeah, wait, you don’t know what that word means. Try asking Chandler.

I’ve seen high school kids rant about their “love”. Which standard? 8th? 9th? 10th? This reminds me of that Kannada movie where a 10th std girl was depicted falling in love with a college guy( I may be quite mistaken, check the review). The two child artists (pardon the pun) apparently romanced on screen. And if your outlook is anywhere near mine, you’ll say “Duh!”. I’ve seen my friends babble on their high school “love”. I’ve politely listened to all that for about two years now. But seriously, am like “What? Get a life!. Dud!”

Teenagers saying “I love you!” all the time, to every other person. Bah!

Those words have to mean something when you say them. Truly mean something. Its like a binding, invisible contract, if I may say so. One of my good friend in one of his short stories talks about such a bond, made with the hands. I was quite happy to note that at least someone really gives true love some value.

Mind it.

Do not assume that I have no experience on such matters of my own. I’ve had my share of crushes and more. I might have stumbled once, but I picked myself up at the right time.

Running away, are we?

“Suicide is the most sincere form of self criticism”

Life is no easy affair. It never is. You try to make it easy, no-can-do... it still defies you.

I have little respect for people who kill themselves. The death rate might go up. But hey! It’ll be down the next minute. Why does ANYONE want to kill themselves? Huh? Running away from things? Why though? ‘Cause they cant face ‘em? Again, why?

Fleeing from a situation is no solution. You have one life. You might get snuffed the next minute anyway, so why take the trouble? It’ll be hard. You may cry your eyes dry. You may rant and rave around madly. But at least you can still see if people heard you. If you died, you wouldn’t know. ‘Cause we don’t know about afterlife. :|

I’ve heard people say that they’ll die, and then the others will be happy.
I ask, so? You want them to be happy? Try other means, dud! Why do you want to make THEM happy anyway? Because you love them? Oh.. that’s weird.

I’ve also heard people say that if they die, it’ll teach the others a lesson and make them all weepy.
I ask again, so? Big deal! If you stay, you can teach them more “lessons”. :| And maybe make them weepy more than once.

Enjoy your life. Sure it’ll have its rainy days. But as the old lady in the classic, save up for that rainy day.

Running away is NEVER a solution.


PS - This from a girl who,

1. Ran away from home in standard 2nd, cause her Mamma scolded her. She went to the house maid’s place, who later brought
her back.
2. Walked back from school before the morning assembly without informing anyone in standard 4th, cause the class teacher had punished her since a few days before, for having lied. She had lied because she didn’t want to be caned.
Yeah, she didn’t want the cane on her.

PPS - Ask my Mom if you don’t believe me. She reads my blog too.


My exams are finally done. I had my EVS paper today. I did well.

I might be feverishly blogging for the next few weeks, or I might just be lax.

Either way, here’s my post after almost a month!


Cheers all.